The Shame of Survival

Contents

List of Illustrations

Acknowledgments

Introduction

1. My Family and the Nazis, 1929–1936

2. A Small Quarry Town, 1936–1938

3. Kristallnacht and the Beginning of World War II, 1938–1940

4. Today Germany Belongs to Us—Tomorrow, the Whole World, 1940–1941

5. You Are the Future Leadership of the Hitler Youth, 1941–1942

6. Between Conformity and Rebellion, 1942–1944

7. In the Belly of the Beast: The Teacher Seminary, 1944–1945

8. The Big Wheels Are Leaving for the West, January–March 1945

9. We Don’t Kill, We Heal: The Russian Invasion, 1945

10. My Hometown Becomes Polish, 1945–1946

11. Refugee in the Promised Land of the West: Return to School, 1946–1948

12. Finding an Intellectual Home: University, 1949–1954

Epilogue

Books Consulted

Index

“[Mahlendorf’s] is a straightforward, honest, intelligent, and at times painful recollection of how a young and impressionable girl of ten years could fall victim to the propaganda of the local National Socialist establishment; how a community of adults, from her own mother to neighbors, relatives, teachers, and youth leaders, not only looked on but reinforced a worldview based on deception and lies; and ultimately how the author struggled for decades to come to terms with the lies that defined her childhood.”

—Petra Goedde, Journal of Modern History